Soulful Community

Everyone has an ego, yes. And everyone has unhealthy expressions of the ego, to a greater or lesser extent. The goal then is not to deny the ego, but to heal and manage its unhealthy expressions in order to experience our greatest freedom, joy, empowerment, and purpose.

THE EXPRESSIONS OF UNHEALTHY EGO

The ego’s Weapons of Happiness Destruction show up in pretty predictable ways. You can recognize an unhealthy ego (or an ego out of balance) when you experience the following common negative emotions or behaviors. Notice they are all based in fear. Deceptively simple and strikingly common, these emotions and behavior patterns are telltale signs that the ego is out of balance! Here are some common examples:

Need to control
Need to be right
Blame
Avoidance
Victim mindset
Feelings of not being good enough
Need for external validation
Impostor syndrome
Perfectionism
Projection
Scarcity mindset (fear of not having enough time, money, energy, support, etc.)

For example, if you are at work and you worry that you will not succeed on a project (fear of failure), you know this is your ego being triggered. If you worry that your romantic interest no longer likes you or is cheating on you because they are late in calling you back, you know that is your ego being triggered (fear of rejection or abandonment). It is your ego who judges or compares you to another or an impossibly idealized version of yourself (fear of not being good enough). It is your ego who defends your behavior in an argument (fear of being wrong). It is your ego that feels that “if I only had more of x, y, or z, then I would be happy” (fear of not having enough, fear of survival; need for external validation).